The matter at hand: my sister's wedding. This entry covers the Jan 10 – 15, 2011. I am on an extended vacation from my temporary retirement to go to Phoenix for my little sister's wedding. She’s marrying a completely adorable man and I’m not sure who’s happier, they both so disgustingly deep in love. 100 people flew in for the wedding from all over the US and Canada. I, along with the other snow birds, found myself in Phoenix instead of the frozen land of Prince Edward Island. Granted, I am 27, and most of the snow birds in Phoenix are 3 times that age, but nonetheless I left my cold climate for fairer weather, during my (temporary) retirement.
A typical maid of honor has many duties, most of which include running around doing the little tasks such as breaking up family fights, finding the marriage license, remembering appointments, getting food, etc, to keep the bride sane. (It sounds more maid than honor). My sister is a free spirit however, so I was pretty sure these duties were just going to be getting her to the church on time and trying to rein in her creativity to prevent gaudiness in her wardrobe, the reception room, and for the wedding party. Lindsey had a few extra tasks in mind as I had overestimated how much she had previously accomplished , even though that in itself was a great amount of work. During the last 8 days leading up to the wedding, we accomplished so much and had a great time. I learned that 5 hours of sleep a night is more than adequate. However, I would not recommend cutting caffeine at the same time to reduce sodium and thus puffiness. A fatal mistake that caused my attitude to be less than enthusiastic at times, especially after the bachelorette. But again, I'm getting ahead of myself.
The bachelorette was great! It was on Wednesday. Out of town guests started to arrive that evening and so our bachelorette crew of 8 was formed. Only four of those eight actually drink, so as one of those four, I made up for the more sober of those in our party and especially for the bride, since she wasn't drinking either. We started at Buffalo Wild Wings where my sister and I did the 'Blazing Wing Challenge'. 12 of the hottest wings in 6 minutes, with no water, celery or anything. Basically straight cayenne pepper with plenty of fat, fried, and chicken mixed in. I did it in 4 minutes. My sister came pretty close to the 6 minute deadline. She forgot that wings weren't necessarily lean and was disgusted every time she got a bite of fat. We had a great time that night and ended up at Mill Avenue, near the University, for a night of drinking, hookah, and being the center of attention. Apparently 8 ladies in cute dresses with lei’s, whistles, and banners marking the occasion draws attention. Oh – did I not mention it was princess themed?? Well it was a great night, even if every task I performed the next day took a bit more time and determination than it would have if I had joined the leagues of those not drinking. As one who will have the occasional glass of wine with dinner, drinking as much as I did took a toll on me. As a true maid of honor though, I did it for the bride!
The next evening we had a party at the Holiday Inn. (Yes I do believe that’s a line taken from a rap song). Luckily for my liver and head, it was not the drinking kind of party. The previous April, with both moms, a dad, myself, and the bride and groom in tow, we made the collective decision that Holiday Inn in Mesa was the place for our crew. It had a great big pool, was suprisingly upscale, and a very large hot tub. It did not disappoint. The staff was extremely accommodating and courteous, and even let our group of 20+ hang out until hours after the tub supposedly closed. A few uncles got thrown in the hot tub, possibly by the bride and me, though I’ll never admit it, and revenge was promised, though never sought by our uncles. Lindsey called it the best night of her life, and we were thrilled that our families melded so well together. There were four sides coming together that don’t normally see each other, and it couldn’t have been more enjoyable!
Friday was a day filled with preparations. Our wonderful Canadian family flew to our rescue in the form of decorating the reception hall. Eleven of them showed up during their short vacation and spent 6 hours helping decorate. It started out with laying all of the random items the bride had collected throughout the year, including gold dried strands, 150 peacock feathers, dried twigs, gold spray paint, duct tape, Chinese dollars, vases, pebbles, sand, 10 bags of lentils and so much more. (Yup I did say sand. Not the cool colored kind, but actual giant heavy bag of sand). I had my doubts but luckily I am not the most artistic one in the family. Our aunts turned this collection of items into centerpiece gold. Seriously. They looked professional and planned. The fearful look on our faces at the beginning of the day was so very different from the look of awe as we left the hall ready for the upcoming party. The bridesmaids went to have their nails painted the same ‘mermaid blue’, as dictated by the bride, then a quick 10 minute wardrobe change into rehearsal attire, and off to the church. We saw all of the groomsman appear after a day of relaxing and recovery from the party the night before, and I realized, I was in the wrong side. The boys have it so much easier! They didn’t do any of the decorating and very little of the planning, but got to go to all the parties. I should have gotten closer to Ramsey and jumped sides... The rehearsal at the church was fun to get everyone together, but we were all distracted, wondering how the next day would enfold. We then met up at the House of Tricks, a wonderful cute restaurant in Tempe, for an amazing meal, where our families mingled with relaxed small talk. The rehearsal was pleasant and fun, and we were all set for the big day!
Saturday arrived much earlier than I had planned. I left out the part that we were up until the wee hours Friday night with last minute dress alterations, guests arriving, and preparations, but all of that was forgotten with the excitement of the big day! January 15th had finally arrived! I accompanied Lindsey to her hair appointment in Chandler, and watched her get curly. She had a trial hair appointment a few days earlier, and while her hair certainly was curly and pulled back as she had asked, it had more of a beehive/bouffant feel. Needless to say we gave a few more directions for the hairstylist on Saturday morning and I was monitoring the progress to prevent a big Texas hairstyle from appearing. Before I could see the finished product, the bridesmaids and I rushed up to Scottsdale, a 30 minute drive, to get our hair done at a beauty school, more accommodating for our budgets. Plus everyone would be looking at the bride anyway. Lindsey joined us with the fantastic Taylor Swift coif she had asked for, and we all left with curls pulled back and a peacock feather barrette the bride made (are you sensing a theme) in a hurried fashion to grab food and head to the church so our every moment could be recorded by the photographer.
St Timothy’s is a beautiful Catholic Church that resembles one of the big Lutheran complexes you see. It had an amphitheatre feel, with seats not pews, and a beautiful painting behind the alter depicting saints, angels, popes, and the Jordan River. You could definitely sense this was a place where something magical and holy was about to take place. We started getting our dresses on, which I had made for all the bridesmaids when the bride realized none of the premade dresses looked like she had envisioned. The dresses were long and green, with a small train. Strapless and with a blue sash that had a peacock tail effect, or something similar to the Japanese obis (sp??). They weren’t hard to do and I was happy to come up with something Lindsey liked. Frankly I was thrilled that people didn’t know they were homemade as I had kept this fact a near secret. My dress was purple as Lindsey and I had always known I would never wear green, though we had both known that she would choose green. An unspoken agreement we seemed to have many of. (This includes our agreement that she would get married first and have children, so I could have her adorable - I’m assuming - babies in my wedding. So far, we are following the plan.)
Lindsey applied fake eyelashes to all of us. Something I was dreading, that really wasn’t that bad. I’m not sure why I dreaded it so much, maybe thinking how unnecessary it was, but it made the pictures look very nice and my eyelids really needed a workout anyway. They had been coasting too long without weights.
Lindsey then got into her gorgeous gown. It was a dazzling white with one shoulder of beads. The other side gathered at her hip with more beading, and followed down to a long train. She had decided on both a cathedral and blushing veil, to cover all her bases, with a small crusting of diamond-like jewels along the outside. She looked stunning. Ramsey had no idea what she was going to wear, so he was floored when she came out. We had the sweetest ring bearer (4) and flower girl (5) getting ready with us. The ring bearer is Lindsey’s godson and the children were well behaved and acutely aware of how special this day was. Dad was in his Air Force dress uniform, at Lindsey’s insistence, and looked amazing aside from the fact it has been 10 years since he retired. Mom was wearing a dress she insisted on keeping hidden from us until we arrived in Phoenix. She looked great, wearing a stretchy velvet that would have shown any ounce of fat a normal person had, but mom had none. She was so elegant with a feather strap around her shoulders holding the dress up. She managed to find a dress that met the peacock theme, without using one of the wedding colors as so often happens. It must be so hard to find a mother of the bride dress, to look elegant, but not young or frumpy. She definitely pulled it off!
Okay....time for the wedding. The five minutes between leaving the dressing room and walking down the aisle are a blur. I was so caught up in ensuring the ring bearer and flower girl were having fun and were comfortable, that I nearly missed my time to walk up. I was the last of the bridesmaids and walked up with Ramsey’s brother, Said, a handsome, very young, man. Well, I don’t think I have ever felt more loved than I did at that moment. I saw all of our family and friends in one place, watching me come up the aisle. The smiles were evident and it was so much fun to be around all that love and well wishes! I got to the alter, made the synchronized bow with Said, and we parted to watch my little sister emerge. She was spectacular! She and Dad walked up, like there was nothing else at that moment that made sense, other than to bring her to her soon-to-be husband. January 15, 2011 was clearly the preordained date that my sister was to be given away. The room hushed at their beauty. It could have been a precious moment scene. Ramsey and Lindsey joined, Dad raised the blushing veil, Lindsey shed the only tear she would release that day, Dad walked away, and the traditional Catholic ceremony and mass began. I don’t think Lindsey and Ramsey were separated for a moment of the ceremony. Their hands were entwined and every time their eyes met, they fluttered. It was adorable. The ceremony was so reverent and full of God’s love, including a dedication of roses to Mary with Ave Maria (the one with the high G note) sung solemnly in the background. A few people told us they walked away from the ceremony with a new sense of religion and were determined to return to the church. The priest, Fr Eric, gave a moving homily about the difference between love and the emotion of love, a notion that was echoed throughout the speeches during the night. Lindsey and Ramsey were given three opportunities to ‘kiss the bride’ and took advantage of every one! After Mr and Mrs Hamood were announced, everyone filed out of the church and headed to the big party. The bridal party entered the hummer-limo, and the rest of the guests climbed onto the bus to transport them to the reception hall for the 30 minute drive north. There was a sense of excitement in the limo, and it was funny, because despite the charged atmosphere, nothing felt that different. My little sister was married, but I didn’t feel the loss I expected, just their excitement, love, and hope for the future.
We took pictures with the photographer, a talented and very patient, but cheesy man, while the rest of the guests enjoyed the cocktail hour of cheese and open bar. We filed into the room we had painstakingly decorated for the dinner, ate some great Italian food, and settled in for the speeches. The room had a long head table with thirteen round tables facing it containing just over a hundred guests. To the side of the head tables were two golden trees with crystals hanging from them, very Tim Burton-esq that were made out of the dead twigs and sprayed golden only days before. Next to this was the cake table with a golden hexagonal cake with peacock feathers drawn on. When we were making plans, I suggested to Lindsey this might have been too busy, but as long as they used buttercream icing rather than that wax they pretend is edible call fondant, I was in. The actually fit in the room and wasn’t as gaudy as I expected, but it also just missed the mark somehow. It didn’t meet Lindsey’s vision, but definitely helped solidify the peacock theme, especially with the giant peacock next to it. Oh and it tasted fantastic, which isn’t always the case. Along the side wall was a table set up with place cards inside a wooden box my dad constructed filled with green lentils, part of Lindsey’s master plan. Next to that was a table filled with favors: playing cards and matchsticks with the date inscribed, a cd Lindsey burned for everyone that had that 90’s mix tape feel of love songs, and wedding pictures of the newlywed’s parents and grandparents. This was a sweet touch, simultaneously showing generations of love, and honoring the dead as both Lindsey and Ramsey had only one grandparent each alive and in attendance.
Onto the speeches so we could all dance. I had been forming what I wanted to say for about a week, but had only sketched it out on paper that morning during Lindsey’s hair appointment. I wasn’t nervous about the speech as public gatherings don’t bother me, especially in a room of those I love, but I also felt bad I hadn’t adequately prepared. My grandfather gave the blessing, which as a military man included a somber moment praying for the troops and their family. One of Lindsey’s favorite things about Ramsey is that their first and last names both have the same three letters – SEY and OOD. Thus my cousins Michelle and Leanne, the amazing MC’s of the evening coined ‘Seyood’. They had Lindsey and Ramsey play a game where they asked them a question and the couple would hold up the shoe of the person that applied to, i.e. Who controlled the remote. It was a fun game that they answered nearly every question identically. They only picked themselves (and thus did not agree) for who was the best kisser. Ramsey’s surprised parents gave a speech that they had only been informed they were going to make a few minutes earlier. My parents gave a moving and inspired speech about how love is a choice that must be made at times, echoing Fr Eric’s words. Definitely the most touching speech of the night. Said gave a great but nervous toast, which he had informed me he had practiced many times. I stood up and spoke about my sister and her new love. I remember talking about how the sign of peace during the mass has great significance to my family, and some things about their relationship with God, but I forget the details. People tell me it came off heartfelt. Phew!
We spent the rest of the night in the photobooth and dancing. Yes I did say photobooth! There were even props. Totally random groups of people lined up to take photos of which they and the happy couple got a copy. Lindsey and Ramsey had a beautiful first dance, and she and dad danced to Johnny Cash’s ‘Ring of Fire’. Something I question to this day as a random choice, but it just happened to be their song. Ramsey and his mom danced, though I missed it and many other details of the night, as I was having so much fun catching up with all of my family and friends. I eventually made it to the dance floor and got a few photobooth photos with different people, but missed out on the hookah. It was rare for our family to out-danced, but it happened! We knew we liked that Ramsey character.
The entire night was magical, and it ended much too early while Lindsey and Ramsey left for their honeymoon through a tunnel of sparklers in their shoe-polished car that announced ‘Seyood’ was now married. A few of us stayed behind and cleaned up, then headed back to the Holiday Inn where the party continued until early in the morning. Lindsey and Ramsey went off to the Bahamas early the next morning and the rest of us stayed behind and visited. All of us agreed...everything was smooth sailing and perfect. I hope my wedding will be as beautiful, though I fear since Linds’ was so seamless, mine (once I find a husband) may have more twists and turns involved. The next installation in my journey is of Vegas and Idaho, though that’s not part of this magical wedding tale.
